Finally Friday and Fingers Crossed!

So . . . it's been a big week for this gal!  I've done surprisingly well (in my opinion) with handling my in-office ex situation.  M is still agreeing to keep his office door closed as much as possible in exchange for my attempting to have no crying/yelling outbursts!  And I am very proud to say, I have not cried once this week.  In fact, maybe the letter/closure events from last week may have been just what I needed to say goodbye to one chapter of my life and hopefully start another.

Yesterday I had some sort of eye infection/swelling issue and ended up at 2 different doctors and missed my dancing classes last night.  NOT a happy camper to say the least.  I teach nine 2-year-olds once a week and assist with a class of six 9-year-olds.  It can be very stressful but it is also very rewarding and I hate not being there for even one week.  I've found a new inner-strength since returning to dancing.

Yesterday was also a big day personally for me because of K.  Cliff notes . . . K and I dated for a while pre-Katrina and have kept in touch from time-to-time since.  We always had a special kind of something but always seemed to have bad timing.  Either work or activities or other relationships seemed to block any movement forward for us.  Cut to now . . . he's currently single and well, now so am I.  Unlike M, K has the same goals as me.  He wants to marry, have kids and just enjoy his life with that special someone.  M, on the other hand, always vowed to stay unmarried and hated the thought of kids!  Soooo not like my personality.  Yesterday I talked with K for a while and we are going to get together soon to catch up.  Maybe it's true that everything happens for a reason, or maybe it's true that timing is everything.  Either way . . . fingers crossed that this may be the moment i've been waiting for :)

"Everything worthwhile is worth the wait!" - Yentl Reynders

So pretty and so shiny :)

Wedding Wednesdays

For better or for worse . . .

So, exactly one week ago today life seemed completely different.  Seem a little drastic . . . well yes, it is!  If you follow my blog, you will know that me and M (my ex) have been on again off again for quite a few months and i've really been uncertain about how I felt, how he felt, and what our fate would be.  So last week, for better or worse, I wrote him a letter.  It was a combination of good and bad feelings, but it said exactly what I was thinking.  I poured my heart out and laid everything I had on the line . . . was he the one?!  I had to know our fate.  I tearfully handed M my note and walked away hoping for the best . . . but expecting the worst.

On Tuesday, M asked if I could meet after work (yes, we work together too, ugh) to discuss my letter.  So, maybe I over-think some things but often I know people and their reactions very well.  My first thought was M wanted to meet after work so that my sobbing would not be witnesses by our office when he let my heart down.  Crazy thought?  But oh so true.

On Tuesday evening I was informed that there is officially no more "us" and that there is now someone new.   In a matter of days, i've been able to calm down and move from the "I want to stab him every time he walks by my desk with a letter opener" to "maybe things will work out one day and maybe they won't."  But there is one thing I know for sure . . . I am an amazing person who cries and gets emotional, but I also love just as passionately.  And anyone who gets to experience that is extremely lucky.

So, what now?!  M has agreed to keep things as quiet as possible at work and have his door closed at all times.  Out of sight, out of mind right?!  I have also agreed to calm down and if I get emotional I will talk to him like a 30-something year old adult and not a psycho in Lifetime movie.  Since we live on the same street, I go out of my way to not pass his house on my way to work.  I will not go to a bar or event that he may be at, and we are no longer friends on fb.  I know more about the "new girl" than he will ever want to know, and my guess is it won't last.  That being said, maybe we weren't suppose to either.

So, no talking at work, no passing his house on my way to work, i've also started taking dance classes again and and teaching as well.  In addition to my new running routine, i've also started tennis lessons.  The goal here people is to keep busy.  Because if i'm busy then I can't think about him, and if I can't think about him, then I can't be sad, right?!

And finally, maybe one day i'll muster up enough nerve to actually thank him.  Because going from couch-vegger to 5 days a week of workouts is certainly something my next bf is gonna appreciate ;)

Hair-tastic!

So . . . i'm combining this post, 1/2 of Wedding Wednesday, and 1/2 of the continuation of my hair-tastrophy!  I found this pic of a beautiful bride and loved her hair at the same time.  Given all my hair drama, I am still planning on growing my hair long again (which seems soooo hot and taking forever in the 95% humid New Orleans heat), but have given up on anything but subtle changes to it!  If you've followed my hair diary, I have lately been experimenting with color and length and have settled on what I had to begin with!  Go figure!  This pic is basically how I wear my hair everyday (side parted and pulled half up) but much longer (which is the end goal here)!  So here's to suffering through the remaining summer months of "hair growing" this year . . . and to having my long, straight hair back for next summer :)

Wedding Wednesdays

So, i'm toooootally feeling blah about love and romance and boys and everything associated with relationships right now.  But I decided to post an adorable little VV Wedding Wednesday story and some other fun photos . . . just with the hope that all my blah feelings about love will one day fade and I can hope for a fairy tale of my own someday!

http://www.vineyardvinesblog.com/wedding-wednesday-craig-and-meredith-anderson.htm